


to have to hold to cherish

by 10velysweetfantasy



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Bloodplay, Discrimination, M/M, Vampires, mostly fluff than smut or angst, slightly messed up hierarchy you'll see - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-17
Updated: 2019-07-17
Packaged: 2020-06-27 12:49:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19791232
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/10velysweetfantasy/pseuds/10velysweetfantasy
Summary: When Johnny and Jaehyun were not even a year old, they were brought into each other's lives. Jaehyun as Johnny's "human", due to Johnny being an infected child, a victim of a genetic mutation that made him a vampire. Johnny has been raised to cherish Jaehyun, because that's the only blood bank he'll ever have.Johnny sees Jaehyun as so much more than that, though.





	to have to hold to cherish

Johnny’s first memory was of Jaehyun.

Maybe his first memory should have been with his parents, but it just wasn’t. When his mind reached back as far as it would allow, stretching its limits, it was Jaehyun. Jaehyun with his chubby cheeks puffed out, doe eyes drooping, head slowly falling onto Johnny’s shoulder. They were only kids at the time, but it was a habit Jaehyun had never broke.

Nearly grown, in their teenage years, it was still Johnny that Jaehyun sought out when his body had grown too heavy and his eyes were fluttering, searching for a dreamland. Johnny never found it bothersome; he easily accepted Jaehyun’s affections, glad to be warmed. Both his body and soul seemed to settle into a peaceful warmth whenever Jaehyun was around, and it could have easily been brushed off at having known each other for their entire lives, but Johnny was certain it was the bond they had formed.

Not everyone could boast that they were so close with their best friend, especially people in their type of situation. Yet, Johnny and Jaehyun had always found serenity within each other, and even from a young age they knew that was something special, something to be cherished. 

They’d had one another since even before they could walk or talk, meaning that most of Johnny’s memories were overflowing with Jaehyun; with soft cheeks indented by deep dimples, small hands tugging at Johnny’s shirt for attention, those same hands pressing against his own in order to be held. Even though they had other friends Jaehyun could seek attention from, it was nearly always Johnny he went to.

Johnny couldn’t lie and say that it didn’t make him feel special, because it did. Knowing that he was Jaehyun’s favorite, as children and even as they were older, was very special.

The words “special” and “Jaehyun” seemed to be very interminably interlocked in Johnny’s heart, though, not that he would acknowledge this fact in the broad daylight where it might become noticeable. 

This was the exact reason why two weeks before senior year, heat bearing down on them creating a sticky layer of sweat over their skin, Johnny gently nudged Jaehyun off of him. Jaehyun, inevitably, grumbled but lifted his head off Johnny’s shoulder, lips pushing out into a displeased pout. Sitting across from them in the grass, Doyoung eyed them with curiosity, lips wrapped around a popsicle. The frozen treat had started to drip down his hand, but he didn’t seem to notice.

Taeyong was sprawled out next to Doyoung, eyes closed, absorbing the last of the sun before they were confined to dingy walls and fluorescent lighting. If he had been paying attention, though, he would have more than likely taken Doyoung’s hand and licked away the juice that would soon make his hand sticky.

“Is Jaehyun still staying with you?” Doyoung questioned, piercing the comfortable silence that had wrapped around them ever since Taeyong and Jaehyun had declared exhaustion. Johnny wouldn’t say it, because he adored Jaehyun and Taeyong was sweet, but he thought they were full of bullshit.   
  


Johnny nodded, carding a hand through the aforementioned boy’s hair. Jaehyun merely hummed in response, leaning into Johnny’s touch. His head tilted slightly, angled upwards to meet Johnny’s hand, and by doing so his neck became more exposed. Bruises lined the pale skin, in varying degrees of healing. Johnny winced at the sight; swore that he was careful, but Jaehyun bruised like a peach. It was part of the reason he was saved as Peaches in Johnny’s phone.   
  


Johnny dropped his hand from Jaehyun’s hair, evoking a low whine of protest from Jaehyun. His fingers reached out to trace the constellation of marks on Jaehyun’s neck instead and Jaehyun tensed, shooting Johnny a warning look. Doyoung also froze, viewing the moment through an outsider’s eyes though that wasn’t exactly what he was. He licked his lips, fangs flashing for merely a moment, before he pressed his mouth into a thin line.

Taeyong had this weird thing where he was oddly perceptive and in that moment it was useful as he said, “So who’s carpooling with who this year?” He hadn’t even opened his eyes. He remained prone on the ground, hand resting carelessly on Doyoung’s thigh, but he had intervened an inevitable argument. 

“Johnny is driving me.” Jaehyun announced with a severe sort of finality. There was no doubt in anyone’s mind, really, that Johnny wouldn’t spoil the absolute living shit out of Jaehyun. It wasn’t that Johnny’s parents were rich, but they were financially stable enough that not a single eyelash was batted when Johnny wasted more money on Jaehyun.

It wasn’t in material items either. He would do anything to make Jaehyun happy and  _ everyone _ knew that.

“Considering the fact that you’re living with him, I’d sure hope he’d be kind enough to give you a lift to school,” Doyoung said dryly, though it wasn’t in ill will. Jaehyun let out an indignant huff, prepared to throw himself into a bickering battle, but Johnny placing a hand at the back of his neck was enough to settle the younger. 

“Speaking of your situation,” Taeyong yawned as he sat up, rolling his shoulders back. “Have you spoken to your parents at all, Jaehyun?”   
  


Jaehyun became tense beneath Johnny’s hand, prompting the older to rubbing soothing circles into shoulders. There weren’t many things that could stress Jaehyun or upset him, but this was certainly one of those few touchy topics that triggered such negative emotions. He was quiet for a moment before slowly shaking his head, a crestfallen look having formed. Doyoung shot Taeyong a glare, poking the human’s cheek with his popsicle, juice dripping down Taeyong’s jaw.

As much as Johnny would have loved to see how that particular fight would play out, he’d prefer to cheer Jaehyun up and he wasn’t sure he could do that around Doyoung and Taeyong, who were much too curious for their own good. 

Once again, Johnny carded a hand through Jaehyun’s impossibly soft hair and ducked his head down to whisper, “C’mon. I wanna stop by somewhere before we head home, okay?”

Jaehyun tilted his head, peering up at Johnny with impossibly wide curious eyes. Johnny had to strengthen his resolve by tenfold in order to reassure himself that he wouldn’t break underneath that very gaze. Jaehyun was Johnny’s weakness, as well as his heart, and he had always been. Johnny was certain that it would remain that way for the rest of their lives as well. 

“You’re leaving us already?” Taeyong taunted, but there was no real heat to his words. In fact, his jaw seemed rather tense as if he was aware of his mistake at mentioning Jaehyun’s parents and wanted nothing more than to make it up to the younger boy. “A shame, we could have had a sleepover like the old days.”

Doyoung let out a derisive snort before diving directly into every possible reason as to why they couldn’t actually have sleepovers like they once used to. Taeyong remained sprawled out on the ground, listening to Doyoung berate him but flashing an apologetic smile in Johnny and Jaehyun’s direction as they pulled themselves to their feet and headed for the front. 

The moment they were out of eye sight, Jaehyun’s hand had found Johnny’s and interlocked their fingers together. Johnny pressed his lips together, finding that he didn’t have it in him to reject Jaehyun twice in a row so he would just have to deal with their sweaty palms pressed against one another. Jaehyun peered up at Johnny expectantly as they made their way down the sidewalk, towards Johnny’s car.

Sometimes, Jaehyun thought, looking at Johnny was like looking at the sun. It hurt, but it was worth it for those few glorious seconds that the world seemed shiny and perfect. Like the gentleman he was, Johnny opened the passenger side door for Jaehyun then got in the driver’s seat. 

“I didn’t realize you were bruising badly again,” Johnny said after a few moments of badly auto tuned music filling the car. Jaehyun winced, although he knew that this particular conversation would have to be brought up at some point. His own fingers fluttered against his neck, brushing against the marks Johnny had left on him. He would be careful to cover those once school started again. 

Vampires were kind enough to Jaehyun, it was the other humans that weren’t confined to the ties of a vampire, that could be somewhat cruel. Not that Jaehyun truly cared. He was happy with his life, he was happy with Johnny. 

“It’s no worse than usual,” Jaehyun protested though he knew it was a rather weak argument, especially for something that worked Johnny up so badly. The vampire remained quiet, running his tongue over his fangs, something he only did when he was thinking. Jaehyun could only hope that his thoughts wouldn’t lead him down a dark road again, as it sometimes did. In an attempt to distract the tall vampire, Jaehyun reached out and rested his hand on Johnny’s thigh.

Jaehyun was rewarded with the smallest smile forming on Johnny’s lips.

A few minutes away from home, Johnny pulled up at the small gas station that the boys and their friends had made plenty of pit stops at over the course of the past few years. The sun was beginning to dip back down behind the earth, meaning the heat was slightly bearable at this point, and yet the blast of air conditioning from the small gas station had Jaehyun melting into Johnny’s side. 

Johnny let out a small chuckle, arm winding around Jaehyun’s arm to support him as he lead them back to the freezer section. “Choose your favorite, Hyunnie,” Johnny offered, pointing to the popsicle section. “Grab some drinks too. We’ll have them outside before going home.” 

Jaehyun’s entire face lit up, dimples digging into his doughy cheeks, and almost as if it was a conditioned response, Johnny found himself smiling back at the younger. He patted Jaehyun’s head, turning and leaving him to make very important decisions, before wandering into the medicinal aisle. Away from Jaehyun, he allowed his inner turmoil to take over. His eyes found the exact thing he was looking for and grabbed the slim tube before heading to the checkout counter to wait for his boy. 

Jaehyun appeared beside Johnny a mere moment later, dropping the box of popsicles down on the counter along with a bottle of electric blue gatorade that Johnny had no doubt would stain the other’s lips later in the evening. Johnny shot Jaehyun a brief smile that he didn’t notice, due to being enamored by the display of candy. 

When Johnny pulled out his wallet to pay he wasn’t exactly shocked to hear the cashier ask, “Sir, you’re letting your Pet pay?”

Jaehyun’s head snapped up so fast that Johnny heard an audible crack radiate from his neck. Gone was Jaehyun’s warm eyes and smile, replaced by a blank but severe expression. “He’s not a Pet. And nor am I. In fact, he’s a vampire and I’m his blood bank. Maybe you should just let him pay and learn to keep your thoughts to yourself when they’re not needed.” 

The girl, considerably younger than both boys, flushed a bright red as she hurried to collect Johnny’s money. She obviously had to be new, considering Johnny and Jaehyun frequented the gas station often enough that most of the employees not only knew them, but knew their situation fairly well. 

Outside of the gas station, Jaehyun settled onto the curb and tore into his popsicle (quite petulantly if Johnny might add). Johnny’s lips quirked up slightly as he settled beside the human, gently bumping the shoulders together. Jaehyun didn’t say anything and neither did Johnny, because there was really no need to. They had each other and they loved each other, and that was what truly mattered. 

*

Jaehyun could tell that something was off, could sense that something was wrong. He didn’t have any heightened senses like his vampire friends, but that wasn’t something he needed when it came to Johnny. When it came to Johnny, Jaehyun’s best friend and someone he had spent his entire life with, it was quite apparent when something was wrong.

It genuinely had just started off as something small at the back of Jaehyun’s mind, sort of like a word you forgot, waiting until it would finally come to you. It felt like that, waiting for that final piece to click into place. And yet, it never did, so Jaehyun just continued to ignore it, wondering if maybe he was wrong for once. 

Except, he wasn’t, he never was, and he was proven right when Johnny collapsed in the kitchen on a particularly gloomy Sunday morning. 

Jaehyun froze for a moment, eyes wide, movements uncertain. It had been such a long time since anything like this had ever happened, such a long time since he had seen Johnny anywhere close to weak. He shook it all off within seconds though, dropping to the ground beside his best friend, shaking him as gently as he could, panic causing tears to form in his eyes.

“Johnny,” he sniffled out, shaking the vampire’s shoulder harshly. Johnny’s eyes fluttered open and he peered up at Jaehyun, seemingly just as confused. “What the fuck, John! What happened?” Then it struck him, hindsight being 20/20. It had been a considerable amount of time since Johnny had drank from him, Jaehyun realized. “Johnny… you didn’t…” 

Johnny sat up, using the cabinets for support, leaning against them as he peered at Jaehyun, shame pooling in his honey eyes. “I’m sorry, Hyun,” he said in a small voice, dropping his eyes down to the floor to avoid the hurt fluttering across the younger’s face. “You were bruising so badly. I didn’t want to keep hurting you.” 

Jaehyun wanted to be mad, he wanted to yell at Johnny or scold him, but he knew better, he knew that it wouldn’t help at all. What Johnny really needed at the moment was comfort, a shoulder to lean on, and also: blood. Jaehyun shuffled across the floor towards him, eyes wide and imploring as he shrugged the collar of his shirt down, away from his neck.

“We’ll have a serious conversation about that later,” Jaehyun whispered, fingers brushing through Johnny’s hair soothingly. “For now, you need to drink, okay? Then we’ll get in bed and have a movie marathon, yeah?”   
  


Everything in Johnny’s face and movements screamed reluctance, but Jaehyun could say without a doubt that he really didn’t give a fuck. He curled his fingers around the back of Johnny’s neck, jerking his face closer to Jaehyun’s neck. With Johnny closer, Jaehyun could make out the soft panting escaping from Johnny’s mouth now, his warm breath brushing against Jaehyun’s exposed skin. Jaehyun squirmed at the sensation, the feel of it spurring him to dig his fingers into Johnny’s skin harder, urging him to just go for it.

Johnny hovered, still hesitant, before he could no longer handle it. There was something about Jaehyun’s scent that was intoxicating, too hard to say no to when he was this close. Johnny’s hand met Jaehyun’s hips, pulled the younger into his lap, and at the same time, his fangs sank into the soft flesh of Jaehyun’s neck. It was all familiar, the brief flash of pain before pleasure and hunger consumed the two of them.

As they got older, it got better. When they were smaller, there was no tug in their guts that made them want to push it further, see where it went. 

Jaehyun’s fingers found purchase in Johnny’s hair, and without meaning to, his hips pressed down hard against Johnny’s, a gasp flying from both their mouths. Johnny’s tongue and teeth roughly lapping at Jaehyun’s skin, his blood, it was all so  _ normal _ , so comfortable, that it was almost scary. Except it wasn’t. Johnny was home, he was everything that made Jaehyun feel warm on the inside. These thoughts flashed through his mind as he clawed at Johnny, trying to get as close as possible, but then almost as soon as it had started, it was over, Johnny pulling back.

They both took a moment to catch their breath, Johnny’s head resting against the cabinet and Jaehyun’s head resting on Johnny’s chest. After they had both recovered, Johnny slipped Jaehyun off his lap. Jaehyun watched through hooded eyes as Johnny located a wash cloth, dampened it with warm water, then knelt beside Jaehyun and began to gently clean him, avoiding Jaehyun’s gaze. 

After an entire minute of this, Jaehyun decided he could no longer stand it. He gripped Johnny’s wrist gently but firmly, forcing Johnny to meet his eyes. Shame and guilt had once again formed in his honey pools and Jaehyun let out a low hiss, finding himself enraged at whoever had made Johnny feel less than he should have.

“Johnny,” he spoke in a hushed tone. “It’s okay, I’m okay. You didn’t hurt me. You’re okay too.  _ We’re  _ okay.” Johnny didn’t seem convinced and maybe Jaehyun was high off all of the pheromones and that was what drove him to do so, but he leaned in, lips sliding against Johnny’s blood coated ones. It should have been disgusting, it should have been horrifying to taste your own blood, but Jaehyun couldn’t exactly say he minded it. 

Johnny pulled away first, cheeks tinted pink and continued to clean off Jaehyun. Jaehyun kept his hand on Johnny’s cheek, despite how much Johnny was moving, thumb wiping off any remainder of crimson on Johnny’s chin and lips. 

The kiss and any memory of the exchange all was long forgotten once Johnny had tucked himself and Jaehyun in to recover.

*

“What’s the deal with you and Jaehyun?”

The question, asked by Yuta, had come out of nowhere. Johnny had simply been sitting at the lunch table with his friends, watching as Jaehyun, Taeyong, and another of their human friends, Jungwoo, waited in line at the vending machine. The question, though, had immediately caught Johnny’s attention, bringing it back to Yuta and his assigned human, Sicheng. The two were sitting shoulder to shoulder, Yuta’s hand probably resting on Sicheng’s thigh beneath the table. It almost seemed like as long as they had been assigned to each other, they had been in love as well. 

“I don’t know what you mean,” Johnny replied honestly, raising his eyebrows. “Jaehyun and I are best friends, like we’ve always been.”

“Johnny.” Sicheng’s tone was exasperated, but that was usual for him. “You almost knocked out a human’s teeth the other day for even looking at Jaehyun. Best friend’s don’t do that.”

Johnny bit his lip, considering his friend’s words, as well as thinking back on the situation. The human had been doing a whole lot more than just merely looking at Jaehyun, though, and that was a fact. He’d had Jaehyun crowded against the lockers, flirtatious grin and words thrown in Jaehyun’s direction. Johnny should have known that it wasn’t his place to step in, but he couldn’t help it, not when the direction of the conversation had turned plain spiteful and Jaehyun was being referred to as a blood whore. 

“We’re just friends,” Johnny found himself repeating again, much to his friend’s disbelief. Yuta and Sicheng exchanged a glance, but didn’t press the subject further, especially with Jaehyun and the others returning.

“Did Johnny tell you about what we’re doing for winter break?” Jaehyun babbled out excitedly, hand caught in Taeyong’s. Johnny ducked his head down to hide the inevitable smile that formed whenever Jaehyun got excited over something. 

Yuta’s eyebrows shot up at Jaehyun’s question, and he peered amongst the rest of their friends who had previously been engaged in their own conversations up until Jaehyun had interrupted with his enthusiasm. No one was exactly upset though, they all had a special soft spot for every single one of the humans, but especially Jaehyun and Jungwoo since they were two of the youngest. 

When no one else provided Jaehyun an answer, Taeil, another vampire, spoke up. “No, Hyunnie, he didn’t. What are you guys doing for winter break?”

Before Jaehyun could even get the answer out, Ten, the most mischievous human of their group, blurted out, “Jaehyun, you’re really not going to spend it with your parents?”

The table fell silent, everyone stunned by the question. The group almost entirely avoided the subject of Jaehyun’s parents, even mentioning them let alone asking questions regarding them had become a taboo between all of them. Jaehyun had grown tense, shoulders frigid and mouth turned down into a frown. Johnny reached out to run his hand down Jaehyun’s back soothingly, the movement enough to cause Jaehyun to relax just slightly.

“No,” Jaehyun finally said quietly. “No, I’m not. They didn’t want to see me.” He paused, before continuing with as much enthusiasm as before, but slightly forced. “Johnny and his parents are taking me to Chicago to see their extended family. Johnny promised to show me everything, I’m really excited.”   
  


Everyone else seemed rather uncertain on how to respond to such a mixed display of emotions, but not Johnny, not Taeyong either.

“It’ll be amazing,” Johnny offered, a grin forming on his face as he thought about everything he wanted to do with Jaehyun. “We’ll send you guys lots of photos.”

Taeyong pouted but there was a defined sparkle in his eye, something soft and special reserved for this particular group of friends only. “Doyoungie never takes me anywhere fun, I’m so jealous!”

“We’ll make a snowman and put a photo of your face on it,” Johnny said, a teasing lilt forming. “That way you’ll sort of be in Chicago with us. How does that sound, Jae?”

Jaehyun seemed considerably more relaxed, eyes darting between his two best friends. “That sounds perfect,” he replied after a brief moment of consideration. “We’ll have to give it two scarves though. You know Yongie gets cold really easily.” 

From there, conversation ebbed and flowed easily, but it didn’t mean that any of them would forget the look on Jaehyun’s face when his parents were mentioned. 

*

For Johnny, he could never forget. He would never be able to push away the image of Jaehyun’s face when his parents left him with the Seo’s, claiming that they couldn’t handle a son who would give himself to a vampire so willingly. Jaehyun, at the young age of 15, was as good as an orphan, watching his parents drive away with a crushed expression.

Johnny had held the younger tightly in his arms, felt the erratic beating of Jaehyun’s heart. 

“Jaehyun,” he said, cupping his doughy cheeks, tears of his own forming at the look on Jaehyun’s face. “Peaches. Look at me. It’s going to be okay. You will always have me, no matter what. I will always be there for you.”

Jaehyun didn’t reply, couldn’t reply due to how choked up he was. Instead, he threw himself at Johnny, arms wound around his waist tightly, burying his face into Johnny’s chest. Johnny didn’t feel the need to add onto his words, he knew all that Jaehyun really needed in that moment was someone to hold him.

From then on, Jaehyun was more than just Johnny’s best friend, and the both of them knew it, not that they would ever come to admit it anytime soon. Jaehyun had begun to live at the Seo’s homeb at that point, but he didn’t even have his own room. Rather, him and Johnny had decided to share Johnny’s room, and even as they got older, they entwined their limbs and pressed their bodies against each other’s as they slept at night.

Johnny and Jaehyun were connected not only at the hip, but through their souls as well. They were best friends, but so much more as well.

Johnny reconsidered his answer to Yuta and Sicheng, but kept it to himself.

*

At the airport, waiting to board, it became quite clear that Jaehyun was abundantly nervous. To the normal passerby, he probably wouldn’t look that different than anyone else, but Johnny, who had been raised with him, knew instantly that there was a problem. As they were waiting in line for Starbucks, to grab some coffee while they waited for boarding, Jaehyun tangled his fingers then untangled his fingers over and over again. 

Johnny bit his lip and slid his arm around Jaehyun’s waist, pulling him tight against the older’s side. Jaehyun peered up at Johnny, all round eyes and soft doughy cheeks, bottom lip caught between his teeth. Johnny forced a soft smile onto his face, unable to help the fact that he was just as anxious, if only because Jaehyun was. 

“Everything okay, peach?” Johnny asked quietly, nuzzling his face closer to Jaehyun’s so they could hear each other clearly in the hustle and bustle of the airport. 

Jaehyun squirmed slightly and Johnny felt the younger’s fingers tangle in the hem of Johnny’s shirt now. “Sorry yeah,” Jaehyun replied breathy. “I don’t mean to be acting so weird but… this is going to be my first time on an airplane.”

Johnny paused for a moment, considering, then let out a light chuckle. How could he have forgotten? He held Jaehyun tighter against his side, pressing a soothing kiss next to his temple. 

“No need to apologize, sweetie,” Johnny reassured him, smoothing a hand down his boy’s back. “It’s okay. I’ve flown plenty of times and I’m still in one piece. Besides, you’ll have me to hold onto the entire time.” 

Jaehyun’s cheeks tinted pink, and he pressed his face to Johnny’s shoulder to hide the sight of his smile. He supposed Johnny was right; whenever Jaehyun was with Johnny, everything was just right. 

*

Chicago was much colder than Jaehyun had previously expected despite Johnny’s multiple warnings in the midst of them packing. It wasn’t that Johnny was much warmer than the temperatures outside, but there was a certain comfort in Johnny Suh that had Jaehyun clinging to him every time they left the house. 

“Hyun,” Johnny chuckled, fingers smoothing over Jaehyun’s side. “I was going to hold the door open for you, but with you clinging onto me like that, it’s near impossible.” Jaehyun mumbled out something that almost sounded like sorry, but his face was ducked into the comfort of his hoodie so it was pretty hard to discern. 

That being said, Jaehyun didn’t release Johnny, remaining just as entwined with Johnny as he had before.

Johnny shrugged, not particularly bothered by it, and pushed the door open, strolling into his aunt’s home only to be met with darkness. He blinked a few times, flicking on the lights, trying to recall if any of his family had mentioned going out that night, but he came up empty, finding that he had no recollection of any sort of conversation. He finally managed to untangle himself from Jaehyun long enough to find a note that informed him it would just be him and Jaehyun for the rest of the evening while the family went out to shop and eat.

Johnny hummed to himself. “It’s just us tonight, peach. Are you hungry? Should I make you something to eat?”

When he turned to look at Jaehyun, he found the perfect picture of “anxious” painted on the younger’s face. He quirked an eyebrow questioningly and even offered a hand for Jaehyun to take, just in case it might comfort him, of course. Jaehyun stared at the offered hand and slowly slipped his fingers against Johnny’s palm.

“Actually, John,” Jaehyun began very softly, treading as lightly as possible. “I was thinking that you should probably feed. You haven’t since we got here, and since it’s just us… I was thinking it might be a perfect time, y’know? No risk of anyone walking in or… judging us.” He fell flat, his eyes round once more, as if he was doubting himself and that was the last thing Johnny wanted.

He swallowed hard, squeezing Jaehyun’s frosty fingertips gently. “Okay,” he replied in a croak. “Yeah. That’s a great idea, Jae. Why don’t you head to my room and I’ll meet you there in a second?”

Johnny turned sharply away as Jaehyun scampered down the hall and Johnny was forced to deal with the fact that there was something weirdly intimate about the act of feeding in a house that he had spent many winter and summer months in as child. He tried to shake this feeling off, because honestly, feeding had always been intimate and there was no need to make a bigger deal out of it. At least, this was what Johnny tried to tell himself. 

There was no way of actually telling, not until his fangs were piercing Jaehyun’s pale skin. He shuddered, but forced himself to push open his bedroom door and enter his bedroom. He froze at the sight that awaited him; Jaehyun sprawled out on Johnny’s bed, shirtless and clad in low slung jeans.

Johnny sank onto the edge of his bed with forced ease, not particularly wanting to disturb the beautiful image that Jaehyun painted. 

He ran the very tips of his fingertips along Jaehyun’s collarbones, wracking a small shiver through the younger boy. He traced his finger tips up over Jaehyun’s neck, then his jaw, and his lips, but before he could move on from Jaehyun’s lips, Jaehyun opened his mouth and allowed Johnny’s fingers to weigh heavy on his tongue.

Johnny’s pupils dilated at the sight, unsure how to react. This was the first time anything like this had happened with them, their feedings were usually pretty straight forward, and nowhere near as… erotic. Jaehyun swirled his tongue along the tips of Johnny’s fingers, ran along the underside of them, before pulling back with a small pop. They met each other’s eyes in mutual silence for a single moment until Jaehyun dropped his head back onto the pillow, tilted his head, so that his neck was bared for Johnny.

Johnny let out a shaky breath before slipping over Jaehyun, knees anchored on either side of Jaehyun’s waist, nearly straddling the younger. He raised a shaky hand to cup Jaehyun’s jaw, tilt his head even further (to prevent any life threatening injuries) and then dropped his head down to the base of Jaehyun’s neck.

He gently nosed at Jaehyun’s pulse, pressed an open mouth kiss right beneath it as a warning before sinking his fangs into the usual place he always did. Jaehyun writhed beneath the taller male, body lurching up to curve against Johnny’s in a way that had the apples of Johnny’s cheeks tinted bright red. 

He tried hard to block out Jaehyun and the way that he squirmed beneath Johnny, causing a tent to form in the older’s pants much to his horror. This became impossible as Jaehyun began to release breathy whines and moans into Johnny’s ears, even panting his name. Johnny was prepared to pull back, unsure that Jaehyun was in the right state of mind to decide if this should go further, but before he could fully do so, Jaehyun’s fingers were trailing down Johnny’s chest, towards his waistband. 

Johnny jumped back from the younger, blood smeared across his chin as he stared at Jaehyun in shock. Jaehyun stared back, but didn’t stop his precise movement of his fingers in their mission to unbutton Johnny’s jeans.

“Jaehyun…” Johnny’s voice came out like a warning, one that he wasn’t sure either of them would heed. 

Jaehyun ran his tongue along his lips, eyes completely and utterly locked on Johnny. “Johnny,” Jaehyun practically cooed, his name the closest thing to a prayer that Jaehyun could ever utter. “Please. I want this. How… How did you not know?”

“Know… what?” Johnny questioned, though he knew exactly what he meant. How could Johnny not notice that Jaehyun longed for Johnny just as bad Johnny longed for Jaehyun? How could he so easily ignore the truth that their souls were interlocked as more than just friends, but lovers, perhaps forever?

“That I love you.”

That single sentence set something off deep inside Johnny, causing him to release a growl, and bring his blood coated lips to Jaehyun’s completely unmarred lips. Their mouths came together in a collision of love, desperation, and utter adoration. Teeth and tongue meshed together, more blood covering Johnny’s mouth, not that either seemed to mind too much.

When Jaehyun began to rut up against Johnny, the older pulled away, made eye contact, then ducked his head down to slowly begin to lap up the blood off Jaehyun’s neck. Jaehyun watched with dilated pupils, fingers reaching up to tangle in Johnny’s dark hair.

“No one is like you, Jae.” 

The statement spurred Jaehyun on once more, fingers fumbling with the buttons on Johnny’s pants before he found him successful. He snagged his fingers at the edge, attempting to push the fabric down and Johnny caught his wrists, stilling him with a small chuckle. He purred out a small “patience, peach”, which emitted a low whine from Jaehyun. 

Johnny slipped off the bed to rid himself of his shirt and jeans before dropping back onto the mattress to begin to kiss down Jaehyun’s chest. Jaehyun allowed it for a mere minute before he tugged on Johnny’s hair, pulling his lips back up to Jaehyun’s own, and slipping his hand into Johnny’s boxers. Johnny jumped at the feel of Jaehyun’s long fingers wrapping around his length. 

Johnny knew that Jaehyun wasn’t inexperienced, just as Jaehyun knew the same about Johnny. It wasn’t necessarily something they discussed, or worked into conversation, or actually even thought about at all. It was more like something they brushed to the very corner of their minds, something to be touched on only when spring cleaning occurred and then it would be swept away, covered by cobwebs of other memories, more important topics.

Johnny was once again forced to brush these thoughts back into the corner of his mind as Jaehyun stroked his length, slowly, leisurely, but with a purpose, of course. Because that was how Jaehyun was, everything he did had a purpose. It was one of the many reasons Johnny loved him, oh god, he  _ loved  _ Jaehyun.

Jaehyun must have been able to tell that Johnny’s mind was wandering, and that truly just wasn’t something Jaehyun would stand for. With a delighted grin, he squeezed Johnny at the base, drawing a guttural moan from Johnny. Jaehyun drew his hand up along the length until he reached the head, where he ran his thumb over Johnny’s slit that was already leaking pre cum.

Johnny let out a small hiss, batting Jaehyun’s hand away to yank off his underwear then work to get Jaehyun’s pants off. Jaehyun didn’t actually offer much help, rather pleased to watch Johnny in his flushed, dazed state fumble to do so. Once he had freed Jaehyun, he wasted no time in slotting himself between Jaehyun’s legs and bringing his mouth down.

Blood still marred his lips and chin, but Jaehyun made no complaints as Johnny slid the head of Jaehyun’s dick into his mouth. He didn’t go much further down, swirling his tongue just around the tip, enough to truly get Jaehyun worked up. Jaehyun squirmed beneath Johnny, jerking his hips just slightly, enough for his length to slide further into the heat of Johnny’s mouth.

Johnny pulled back, a shit eating grin clear on his face. Jaehyun wrinkled his nose up, reaching out to smack Johnny on the face, but before he could accomplish that, Johnny snatched him around the wrist, pressing an open kiss to Jaehyun’s palm. He nipped at the soft skin before dropping his hand and ducking down lower, Jaehyun’s breath catching in his throat at the sight.

He had but a moment to admire how beautiful Johnny looked at every angle possible, before Johnny’s tongue was probing at Jaehyun’s rim. Jaehyun clawed at the mattress, fingers twisting amongst the sheets, not wanting to pull too roughly at Johnny’s hair, uncertain if that was something that the older would like. Johnny pushed past the rim, into the tight asshole.

“Lube…” Jaehyun stuttered out, pushing his own hair back from his already glistening forehead. “Do… you have any?”

Johnny pulled back, considered, then pressed his body against the younger’s as he leaned over to rifle through one of the drawers in the nightstand. As any respectable, young man, he of course had lube and condoms stored away in his nightstand drawer. Jaehyun bit his lip to contain the smile that wanted to form when he saw the items. For a moment, he was scared they would have to stop, and irrationally, Jaehyun was afraid that if they stopped then everything would return to the way it was before.

These thoughts were fleeting once Johnny was pressing his lubed up fingers inside of Jaehyun, fucking him open with love and care. 

He made sure to take special care, to be as attentive as possible in order to milk precious mewls and whines out of the younger. He wanted nothing more than for the lovely human to reach ecstasy, to feel as loved as he truly was. Jaehyun returned the favor, showering Johnny in love, kisses, and more. He wanted them to feel equal,  _ be  _ equal.

By the end of it all, both of their legs were shaking, their arms wound each other, unable to tell where one began and one ended. It wasn’t something that every person, let alone every couple, ever got to experience, and they couldn’t help but feel like one of the lucky ones. 

The stars had aligned for them, and for that, they would always be grateful. 

“I don’t deserve you,” Johnny muttered against Jaehyun’s ear lobe, fingers carding through the younger’s silky hair. 

Jaehyun reached up and curled his fingers around Johnny’s mouth, preventing him from saying more. “You deserve the world, John. And honestly, we deserve each other, don’t we?”

And Johnny couldn’t exactly argue with that logic, so he ducked down and pressed a loving kiss to the human’s mouth.

*

As it turned out, Jaehyun’s inability to pack properly would come back to bite him in the ass when they returned to Korea and he fell ill. Jaehyun insisted it was from travels and plain exhaustion, but Johnny was firm on his belief that it was probably more so due to the fact that Jaehyun didn’t dress properly at all throughout their entire trip to Chicago. 

Despite Johnny’s teasing, it didn’t exactly mean that Johnny wasn’t about to leave Jaehyun to take care of himself. In fact, Johnny babied Jaehyun more than he had ever been babied before throughout the period that Jaehyun was sick, even refusing to feed until Jaehyun was 100% again. Upon Jaehyun’s forced bed rest, there was a good amount of cuddling and hand holding, as well as kisses (Johnny was insistent his supernatural immune system was too strong to fault him).

Johnny also found himself in the midst of aiding Jaehyun with college applications, as Jaehyun would get too whiny half way through working on an admissions essay. 

It was almost like what they had previously had, just not quite. It was more, and that was perhaps the best part. That they were still Johnny and Jaehyun, but they were growing and discovering new things with one another by their side. 

“What are you thinking about?” Jaehyun inquired of Johnny, late into a cool March night. Johnny turned to peer at the younger, who had wound his arms around Johnny’s waist and rested his chin upon Johnny’s shoulder so they could meet eyes.

Johnny gently ran his fingers through Jaehyun’s hair, a small smile pulling up at his lips. “I was just thinking about how lucky I am to have you in my life.” He paused before adding hesitantly, “And how I don’t ever want to give you up.”

Jaehyun blinked, peering at Johnny with not even a hint of negative emotions in his eyes or anywhere on his face. It seemed that rather reacting, he was considering, maybe even thinking upon everything that Johnny himself had already touched upon privately. 

“I would like to be with you always as well.” Jaehyun finally replied, voice soft but sweet. Johnny blinked then grinned and ducked his head down despite the awkward angle, to brush his lips against Jaehyun’s. 

“One day, Hyunnie, one day,” Johnny vowed, resting his hand over Jaehyun’s, squeezing reassuringly. 

Neither had to say it, they both knew it, that they had forever and always to cherish one another. 

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I'm still not so sure this is my best work, but I hope you guys like it because I worked hard on it. Some other bits of info I didn't necessarily get fit in:
> 
> Jungwoo is Taeil's human, Sicheng is Yuta's, Ten is Kun's. 
> 
> This universe is really interesting to me, honestly, and I almost wish I could have explored it more!
> 
> Thank you everyone, especially the mods.
> 
> my [curious cat](https://curiouscat.me/nanasbun), my [twitter](https://twitter.com/slutforjseo), and the official [playlist](https://open.spotify.com/user/ryls2001/playlist/5VRyvwIonkVgYa7mT0c3Ku?si=C_I6ra3gQjindBw5MRgaDQ) for this fic!


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